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"Yes," said Marvin, "do you want to hear this story?"
"I want to hear your speech," said the mattress.
"This is what I said. I said, 'I would like to say that it is a very great pleasure, honor, and privilege for me to open this bridge, but I can't because my lying circuits are all out of commission. I hate and despise you all. I now declare this hapless cyberstructure open to the unthinking abuse of all who wantonly cross her.' And I plugged myself into the opening circuits."
Marvin paused, remembering the moment.
The mattress flurred and glurried. It flolloped, gupped, and willomied, doing this last in a particularly floopy way.
"Voon," it wurfed at last, "and was it a magnificent occasion?"
"Reasonably magnificent. The entire thousand-mile-long bridge spontaneously folded up its glittering spans and sank weeping into the mire, taking everybody with it."

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